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5 Important Messages to Help You and Your Children Succeed in Life

In this article, I will list 5 common limiting messages that limit our and our children’s ability to learn and excel. I will then describe a way to free ourselves and our children in order to manifest a happier, more successful life.

Every family has beliefs and rules stored in the family consciousness handed down from generation to generation. We learn these rules very early in life. Even though we may not be consciously aware of these beliefs, we still follow them. Some are beneficial, some are not. Examples of beliefs handed down in my family include: “My children are very beautiful.”—pretty nice. Not so nice– “If I do not serve my husband all the time and make him happy, he will leave me.”

A mother holds up her child.
A mother holds up her child. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When we honor these rules, even if we are not consciously aware of them, we feel loyal and at peace—no matter what the rule is. When the beliefs limit us, our level of success and enjoyment of life get squelched. We find that we never achieve what we want—because we cannot release ourselves from being loyal to those rules. Here are common 5 limiting beliefs:

Limiting Belief # 1: You are a bad girl or (bad boy).

When a parent or caregiver perceives that a child has done something wrong, they sometimes say “Bad girl.” Or “Bad Boy.” When you think you are bad, you think you are all together bad. People tell a child they are bad in hopes the child will act better. This is not a good way to teach a child to behave. The child, assuming that they are a bad human being, will begin to act that way. The truth is that even when you think you behave badly, you are still a good human being.

Limiting Belief #2: There must be a husband and a wife in the family to raise a healthy child.

We have been taught that children are happier when they have a father and a mother. The truth is that a child can be happy with one parent, with two fathers or two mothers—whether a boy or a girl. All that matters is that we have good parents and a good environment where we feel safe, secure, and where we feel loved.

Limiting Belief # 3: A mother has to stay at home to care for the child.

Some people say that when a mother works and leaves a child with another person, the child will have more problems and feel abandoned by their mother. The truth is whether at home or not, a good parent gives their child a feeling of being beautiful, loved, and valued. What matters is that the child feels beautiful, loved, cared for and nurtured. Whether the parents are at home or not does not matter. That said, it is important that the care giver has the same attitude of valuing the child—not just a babysitter who watches TV.

Limiting Belief #4: Children have to be punished to learn right from wrong.

Spare the rod—spoil the child, the saying goes. Children are sometimes hit, spanked, humiliated or yelled at when they are seen as behaving badly. Punishment does not help children learn. Rather it teaches them to behave badly, to be bullies, tyrants, and to behave in violent, abusive ways. There are only a few instances when force needs to be used—such as when the child is in danger. For those times that force was used upon you, acknowledge that you were an innocent child. Free yourself of that burden of guilt, and without judgment, leave the responsibility to whom it belongs.

Limiting Belief # 5: You have to be a good parent all the time, otherwise you will have bad children.

No one behaves perfectly all the time. When you behave badly to your child, your spouse, or anyone else, say, “I am sorry. I behaved badly.” It can be a huge relief for children to hear, “See—Mommies and Daddies make mistakes.”

Here is a visualization that can help to free ourselves of these detrimental beliefs and patterns: Visualize the family members/care givers from whom you took these beliefs. Say to the them, “I took these beliefs from you but I don’t want them anymore. Please see me with love as I give them back to you.” Visualize these feelings gently returning from you to your elders and your elders lovingly receiving them. Know that your elders are happy to receive them. They know that these false beliefs are not good for you and that once you let go of these beliefs, they can be passed on to wherever they belong.

Sally Herr is a Resonance Repatterner in Portland, Maine who helps people be free of limiting beliefs. She connects with people in person as well as by phone. Her website is NewEraTherapies.com

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Taking Charge of The Energy of Work Place Stress

“Organisms do not experience environments. They create them.” – Richard Lewontin, geneticist

I can’t claim to know this quote but was inspired with it in Margaret Wheately’s new  book “Who do We Choose to Be?- Facing reality, Claiming Leadership – Restoring Sanity”. I think of Wheately as the Deepak Chopra/Chloe Wordsworth of business and management consulting. Her new book is as wonderful as her first from 1992 “Leadership and the New Science” and a must read for those working in situations in need of a new kind of leadership.

In my practice I meet many people who very unhappy in their corporate lives. They start with many fingers pointing at management, difficult colleagues, budget restraints etc. and mostly feel victimized and hopeless. They can initially get quite irritated with me when i explain how the energy of a group works and where they can own their own power to make a difference. Internally if feels justified to blame others because we feel innocent.

The road back is to realize that everyday in every moment we are at a point of choice and can choose to be happy, relaxed, and in a peaceful state of mind. We have the brain hardware to do this and we can control it. However, we can easily fall into a victim state (myself included) when life happens unexpectedly or at least not how we wished it would. We may find it hard to resist options readily provided by our lower brain and unwittingly accept it’s invitation to think negatively – blaming, complaining, being afraid,reactive etc. What we may not realize is that whatever we choose, brings an energy to our field of influence… our family, our coworkers, our volunteer work etc. We create our environment.

What environment have you created for yourself? Consider who is showing up there to hang out with you. What is the tone of the group? Do you feel valued and valuable in this environment? Are you fulfilled? Is it nurturing? Rewarding? Does it make you want to get out of bed in the morning? Is your current experience the one you wanted for yourself?

A great source of unhappiness I see in my practice is for clients facing workplace stress, toxic relationships and general unhappiness. At work they feel unfulfilled and sometimes bullied. The office politics and gossip pool wears them down. It may take a few sessions, but most people start to turn things around when they resonate with taking positive action that makes a huge difference. Simple but effective  things include:

– appreciating the work of others
– asking clearly what they need to get the job done
– clearing up misunderstandings in the moment
– following through with their own commitments
and more.
– discovering their own non coherent group patterns and clearing them goes a long way
– creating new patterns of making others feel welcome and part of the group along with entrainment goes a long way

A new client informed me he was finally convinced about the power of repatterning when he returned to his old formally toxic work place. The same people were there, but the atmosphere was noticeably more positive and uplifting. After doing coffee with a few of his former colleagues he concluded it was the person doing repatterning work on himself that made the difference to the group. At that point he wanted in.

It does not matter where you are on the corporate ladder, when you create your environment to ‘be the change….’ you not only change your experience for you, others will experience it as well.

Notice something positive in your environment today.   Appreciate yourself for the positive thought!

With love and light
Carolyn

 

Borderline Personality Disorder

Sometimes during the course of one’s practice of Resonance Repatterning, one comes across a number of symptoms involving low self-esteem, or a high level of insecurity. These individuals may have a difficult time staying in loving relationships because of certain extreme behaviours. We would characterise this as non-coherent behaviour, while at the same time the client would have certain intentions which we would characterise as positive intentions that they do not resonate with. So we say that ‘Problems are something we have that we don’t want, and intentions are something we want but don’t have,’ and when we’ve identify that, we look at the underlying Unconscious Patterns, not Subconscious, because it could come from our D.N.A., conception issues, parental issues, etc.

Common problems that appear in people suffering from, Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) include:

  • Frequent displays of anger
  • Unstable self-image
  • Irritability
  • Anxiety
  • Impulsiveness
  • Extreme opinions and judgement of others
  • Passive, aggressive behaviour
  • Suicide threats

Individuals with this condition frequently change their goals and aspirations. They may go through friends quickly or change their sexual orientation.

There may be some risk factors historically, especially in their formative years, such as:

  • Being abandoned as a child or teenager
  • Coming from a seriously dysfunctional family
  • Having a normal childhood disrupted
  • Being a victim of verbal, physical or sexual abuse as a child

Here are some possible scenarios:

  • Improving the quality of your relationships, by identifying what is and isn’t working for you and changing it (Unconscious Pattern)
  • Understanding how your unique personal life’s story may impact you attitudes, thoughts and beliefs in order to facilitate change in those which are ineffective (Positive Intention)
  • Gaining insight into your relationship conflicts (Unconscious Pattern)
  • Learning communication, coping and problem solving skills (Positive Intention)
  • Becoming more confident in your relationships, including yourself, being able to speak up for yourself, set boundaries and build demonstrable resilience (Positive Intention)
  • Helping you become more satisfied with what you have and how to get what you want, if you are not (Problems to Opportunities) Adrian Krauss, M.F.T

Whatever a person speaks has a two-fold effect. One is the Action, and the other is the Reaction. The reaction resounds in and near the speaker and creates the same type of thought-currents in his environment. Thus whatever thoughts, virtuous or wicked, emanate from him, they engender their exact resonance. This is an inviolate and unrelenting law, which operates in connection with both animate and inanimate objects alike. It cannot be erased. [Unless one changes the frequencies] ‘Philosophy of the Masters’ Volume I

Give Your Business an Acupuncture Tune-Up

Journeys With Oz

Using the 5 Element Theory of acupuncture and the related business qualities of each meridian as presented in Chloe Wordsworth’s “Transforming Five Element and Meridian Patterns with RR” you can reset the energy for any aspect of your business.   It is a most creative use for the Meridian and 5 Element patterns where you will proxy   the ‘system of energy’ represented by your company.  Ultimately we are talking about the energies of all the people past and present that comprise the entity of your  business that now  forms a group field of energy.   You may be drawn to the idea of Repatterning your business because you have a business problem, but equally, you may want to start this Repatterning with your company vision or a set of intentions for your company.   Check for what is needed – the system often surprises us on where we need to clear patterns.

Next…

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Stress & the power of the Inner Tradition

Do you remember that absolutely wonderful repatterning Chloe facilitated at the last RPA Conference? This was the source article for her presentation http://www.rpamembers.com/RPAAnnualConference2017

Journeys With Oz

…of Chinese Acupuncture to help us evolve to a higher understanding of our present circumstances

By Chloe Faith Wordsworth November 20th 2016
(reprinted with permission)

Stress – a fact of life

Most of our problems, if not all of them, relate to stress.

Research has shown that when we are free of stress, our immune system is strong and well-functioning, and that in stressful circumstances our immune system becomes depleted and loses it optimal functioning.

But research has also proved that when we handle stress in a successful way, our immune system is boosted, even higher than if we had no stress at all.

The challenge of this past year of stress and its opportunity

This year, on a national level, if not globally, millions of people in the US have been seriously stressed out.

Even if you have no political interest, you probably have clients who are angry, afraid…

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Discovering the Potential within Yourself

Michael E. Fisher

Discover the potential within yourself to spiral up into greater coherence at a physical, mental, emotional and spirit level. What holds us back from attaining what we truly want in our life? Is it that we are so preoccupied with being a Victim, and that life has been so unfair, as a result we have not fulfilled our dreams of doing something worthwhile, no matter how personal that may be? Not how the world sees us but how we see the world.

Victims very often become Persecutors or Enablers (Rescuers). The Karpman Triangle was conceived by the psychologist Stephen Karpman, M.D. He utilized the triangle to show how easily we become enmeshed.

In nearly every situation when we become a Victim, we react by becoming either a Persecutor, or equally debilitating, an Enabler.

Victim: “I saw the way you looked at me.”

Persecutor : “Oh grow up. Get a Life.”

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